We cultivate worthiness by cultivating courage, compassion, and connection.
When you try to win someone over...
When you are not authentic...
When you feel shame, practice courage and reach out!
Share your story with someone who earned your trust and can respond with compassion.
You need courage, compassion, and connection ASAP.
This helps you stay in your worthiness.
"Shame hates it when we reach out and tell our story. It hates having words wrapped around it - it can't survive being shared. Shame loves secrecy. The most dangerous think to do after a shaming experience is hide or bury our story. When we bury our story, the shame metastasizes." B.Brown.
However, share your story only with someone with whom you have a trusted connection. Someone who can be vulnerable, embraces you for your strengths and struggles. Talk to the friend who earned the right to hear it.
Stay away from a friend who is horrified with you just to be comforted her/himself; the one who feels sympathy (I'm so sorry.), not empathy (I get it, I've been there.); the friend who can't help you because s/he to disappointed in your imperfections, you've let him down; the friend who is so uncomfortable with vulnerability that he scolds you (What were you thinking?) or he looks for someone to blame (We'll kick his ass.); the friend who is about making it better out of her discomfort (It wasn't that bad. You rock.); the friend who confuses connection with the opportunity to one-up you (Listen to what happened to me.).